The Execution of Lady Jane Gray, by Beverly Army Williams

The Execution of Lady Jane Gray, by Paul Delaroche (France) 1833

The Execution of Lady Jane Gray
 
1. The Lady in Waiting
 
Blindfold me, too.
   How can I watch
the brutal end
to Jane?
 
It may as well be my end
she’s occupied my life
for sixteen years.
 
I saw her educated
wed
bedded
crowned
killed. 
 
Every time he attempts expression
in my face
he falls
short
whacks the paint away.
 
This sorrow
            uncontainable
            unknowable
            unpaintable.
 
2. The Executioner
 
Had I seen her before I killed her, 
I would have brought a sword
fine and sharp, her neck
so little under my ax. 
 
Pretty girl
reminds me of my sister
without the joys
of an average Jane.
 
All that beauty, untested
That fine pedigree, wasted. 
No time to bear a child.
Educated the way the nobles
            like their women. 
To what end? 
 
To this end:
Forgiving me, her eyes
steady, locked to mine
for eternity,
even after she ties
the fabric around her eyes. 
 
As though not seeing the block
will blind her to death’s 
final approach.
 
She stumbles, confused, disoriented,
my ax filling her mind. 
 
It is heavy, 
crushing, 
the blow I must make. 
 
 
3. Lady Jane
 
History, decide how you feel about me, will you?
 
Was I brilliant, or a pawn?
 
Better to say: I was brilliant
 
because: truth
 
and a woman: also truth
 
which meant: no choice
when my traitorous father
did his own bit of scheming 
with frail cousin Edward.
 
I’d like to sigh out “men”
and know all the ladies in the room recognize
my plight. 
 
But as long as we’re after #truthforonce
let’s remember it was Bloody Mary
(you can tell I’m a lady because I didn’t call her Bloody effin’ Mary)
who went back on her word most fatally. 
 
Betrayed me
her cousin: read it: young &
beautiful, womb so fresh and ripe 
and her, despearate for her Catholic
husband, Catholic count-
ry, Catholic killing. 
 
I know. I should be grateful. I didn’t go screaming against the smell 
of my own burning flesh and scorched lungs.
 
I should have practiced getting my 
little neck
down on the block. 
 
I stumbled. 
 
Beverly Army Williams

Beverly Army Williams is a writer, multi-media artist, and writing teacher at Westfield State University in Westfield, MA. Her work has appeared in The Dandelion Review, Interweave Crochet, and Project 333 among other places. She is co-founder and co-editor of the webzine MotherShould.com. Beverly holds an MFA in Creative Writing from the University of New Mexico and lives in the woods of Connecticut with her husband and two demanding dogs.